It’s January 21, 2018! Holy shit, the years really are flying by. I’m excited for everything 2018 could have in store but 2017 was fantastic.
I wish everyone a happy, prosperous, and joyous New Year. Now go work on those resolutions!
Grandpa on my wedding day June 29, 2013.
October 12, 2017 this sweet soul left this earth. I’m not sure how to put into words how I feel. Heart broken with a mix of relief is the best way. He’s no longing fighting. He doesn’t have anymore doctors appointments. No more surgery… He can finally just be.
Grandpa has lived with us (my mom, sister, and I) since I was about 5 years old. Since I was 18 he’s been fighting cancer. But he put up one hell of fight. My whole childhood he was there. Every Friday night he was at the football games “watching me cheer” but I know he was really watching the game.
My heart aches knowing my future child will never know the love this man had for his family. I’m hopeful I can share his life and stories with them so they know the man he was. How very much he would have loved them.
Where ever he is I hope he’s watching over us. I also hope he knows and still feels our love for him.
Grandpa, I know its only been two weeks but I miss you dearly. I know you are finally at peace and I hope you get to spend your days golfing. I will live everyday trying to be the best person I can be while also always being kind to everyone I meet.
Let me just start since this post the weather has definitely decided to work with me. It’s been so hot and sunny this year! We needed it.
So far this summer has been great! I can’t even begin to explain but I’m going to try!
I got to meet this handsome devil IN PERSON! Heart exploded into a million pieces.
A little girls night with my mom and aunt. With my aunts special margarita’s of course.
L bought me a leather jacket. Do I look cool enough?
L working on his truck. I guess that’s one way to do it.
I typically don’t leave for work until 6:30 but this particular morning I had to leave at 5:30.
Sweet boy. Always needs his throw pillow while napping on the couch.
A little Snapchat filter after a pretty intense Betty Rocker workout.
Lake Billy Chinook weekend.
L testing out his captain skills.
After a long day outside these pups were pooped.
I guess that’s one way to nap…
My girl. Always has to be right by my side.
Hot summer drive with all the windows down.
Redneck Luau fun.
Sunset over the lake to close out Fourth of July weekend.
This weekend started out good. Like really good. Friday evening we went to pizza for dinner. My favorite Friday night treat! Shortly after we met with friends and hung out all evening. I don’t know why but I love simple quality time with friends.
Saturday started even better because the sun was shining and it was warm. The weather definitely effects my mood and having the weekends be as nice as they have been is making a huge difference in my mental and emotional state.
The dogs and L were outside all day Saturday while I went to a baby shower and it definitely showed when I got home. Very tired dogs and husband. But 25% of our fence is complete! That’s a win folks.
Sunday we went on a ride. I’m trying to get as many miles under my belt before our trip to Sturgis this summer. It wasn’t as sunny but it was about 10 degrees warmer. We spent the day with great company stopping for lunch and of course our favorite fire pit/brewery.
Of course everyone crashed Sunday night. Its honestly amazing what the nice weather and all the outside time did for us. I knew we needed it but it really hit home as I was getting ready for bed Sunday night. The weekend was incredibly eventful but it was enough to remind me how good we have it. So so good.
Our second now storm has hit and it is magical. We only got about 2 inches but in the Portland area that is a rather BIG deal. It snowed then quickly froze creating a rather large traffic jam. It took my sister 5.5 hours to drive 20 miles.
The snow right before Christmas has been wonderful but also kind of stressful. With only a week to go I’m realizing I haven’t been feeling that Christmas feeling this year. I’ve been playing the Christmas music, watching all the movies, and even decorated our home. But somethings missing. I feel like singing “where are you Christmas” a la Cindy Lou Who.
I know the holiday isn’t about the gifts but we haven’t shopped at all. We chose to buy a few things for the home instead of the traditional needless gifts. We aren’t even doing stockings (my favorite thing on Christmas morning). I know this ridiculous and silly but I am feeling emotional over it.
L is incredibly hard to shop for. I find so much joy is trying to find him the PERFECT gift and stocking stuffers. I know I could sneakily buy him gifts but here’s the kicker/dilemma: we have a joint account and I do not have a credit card. If I were to spend money on the perfect stocking he’d know.
For L Christmas is absolutely not about the gifts. He prefers time spent at home as a little family. Just us and the fur babies. Maybe mimosa or two (or five).
I guess I just miss the big Christmas’ from my childhood. Think Home Alone. 20 people in one house. The adults out numbered by the kids. Us running around being ridiculous, fighting, laughing, consuming too much sugar. I want it all right now. My mom making all her Christmas cookies and my aunts trying to make dinner at the same time. Its all so magical.
I don’t know what the point of this is. I guess I am just in a bit of a funk. I need to stop comparing myself to others and embrace my now. Hopefully sitting down and thinking how I want to embrace the new year will help focus me. Bring me back to my now and hopefully get my mindset back to the positive.
I’m embarrassed to admit I’ve been extremely lazy lately. As soon as I get home from work I put sweats on (after my workout) and most weekends have been spent in my pj’s. Friday to Monday morning the exact pj’s alllllll weekend.
I honestly think a huge role in my epic laziness has been the cold attacks L and I have been under this fall. In September I had my first cold of the season that quickly turned into laryngitis. Then exactly 4 weeks later I got another cold that has turned my nose into a running faucet that doesn’t turn off. I just can’t! L has been consistently sick between all this as well. We’re just done and over it.
So today I’m putting some holiday tunes on (sue me) and cleaning this home. Happy November everyone!
Well… I’ve been absent. I’m sorry but not really. I never intended to ignore this space. I just needed the break. Since my last post in January we have had some serious changes. Good changes. Great changes actually.
1.In February I turned 30. I’m freaking 30. Let me just say when I as 18 this is not how I pictured 30. In ways it’s actually better than I pictured.
2. We bought a house! A fucking HOUSE people! A full post is coming on this but I will say home ownership wasn’t on my radar. I never thought it would be an option.
3. I still haven’t taken my real estate exam. Guys, I don’t know… The schooling was expensive but after buying our house and going through the process as a buyer was eye opening. I’m not 100%. We shall see folks.
4. Fitness and working out is my jam. I haven’t returned to crossfit. I mean it was $140 a month. In January I started following the Tone It Up gals. Guys, this plan works if you follow along and eat cleaner/leaner. The work outs are all available online for FREE. They do have a full 8 week nutrition plan available for purchase but I haven’t felt the need to spend $150 on something L can help with me. After 4 weeks I was seeing results. Since moving 3 weeks ago I’ve fallen off the wagon but tomorrow I’m back at it. #abs
5. So money and my spending freeze. Buying a house forces you to never spend any money. Like putting diesel in my car stresses me out. I’ll go into further detail in my house update.
Well I’m out. My goal for 2016 was to really put more effort into this space. I have new found drive and know I will be back here more frequently.
**I started this about a week ago. Since then I have calmed down and decided I cannot let myself continue to hold onto these feelings. The below is unfinished but a raw emotion at that moment last week.**
After last Thursday’s post I have decided to just be completely open with myself and my emotions. I’m generally a happy easy going gal but sometimes life gets you down….
First, in regards to last weeks post I’m pissed in all honesty. The negativity and mean place that one comment came from really hurt. We use to be so incredibly close and now we’re not, at all. That simple. We have no idea what the others life is even like. So to take time to make such a passive aggressive move not even toward fixing things. I’m not even 100% sure why we’re even fighting anymore but this was the reminder as to why we’re not friends.
It all feels incredibly childish. Two twenty something gals acting this way. Are we both that pethitically stubborn or is this really the best outcome? Once so close we respect for eachother to no longer on speaking terms acting out with low blows? Yes, to answer your question, I do remember when we were best friends. I remember very well. As I’ve said before, it was the rarest friendship. The type you omhold onto a cherish forever.