Restless: searching for motivation 

Morning commute

So I just don’t even know where to begin. I guess the beginning but I’m not really sure when that even is. Last summer I left the insurance world and joined a branch of the construction world. 

This move has had some serious benefits but I’ve slowly been learning I’m not cutout for corporate America. I want out. I need out. 

More often than not I wake up with a pit in my stomach. That pit grows as the morning goes on until I pull into my offices parking lot and I almost crumble. What would happen if I just turned around? Just sat in my car? 

Not everyday is like this but definitely more than I’d like to admit. But I’m not sure how or when to make my next move. My husband thinks I should finish my real estate licensing. I agree with him completely but I’ve been lacking the motivation (maybe confidence). 

I just feel like I’m at a serious crossroads. Basically I need to shit or get off the pot. I’m 31.5 and am so ready for babies. Being my own boss would definitely been more ideal for motherhood. Random fact, the longest maternity leave at my office has been 8 weeks unpaid. WHAT?! Three months definitely feel long enough and 8 weeks is all I’m looking at! 

We leave on a vacation for a week in a week. Once we return I have to get serious. No matter how badly I want to lounge on the couch in the evening I have to get this done. Not just for my dreams of being my own boss but for my mental health as well. 

Happy Wednesday! 

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